Top story this weekend...My friends husband killed himself, and other news.
Friday evening my friend called me and said that she had some horrible news. Our friend's husband decided to take his own life friday afternoon. He was a Fireman, who saved so many lives, but was unable to save his own. He was found hanging from his garage by his wife and four year old daughter. When I heard this my heart imediatly ached for my friend. I dont even want to imagine loosing someone like this. What she is going through I know has to be THE hardest things to go through. She is such a wonderful amazing person. She will go out of her way to make you feel good about herself. She always has such nice things to say. She is one of a kind.
I have so many mixed feelings about what happened. He killed himself. How can someome be so sad to not want to live? He has a daughter. She is one of the prettiest girls you have ever seen with long curly hair and puppy dog eyes. She is just beautiful. How could he want to leave her in this world? If that is not inspiration to live I dont know what is.
Before I had a family, before I got married, I was one sick girl. I tried to end my life several times, two times I ended up in the hospital because I could not stop throwing up all the pills I had taken. I tried and tried, each time taking more and more than the last time and I never left what I thought was my miserable life. I felt like I had nothing to live for. It hurt to get up in the morining. I was full of guilt and sadness. I was too deep in a whole and had given up trying to get out. I was just going to sit in the whole and die.
Now I look back and think, how can one person consume a whole bottle of Mini-Thins which is just ephedrine and not die? It was a miracle, I guess there was a better life in store for me.
Now that I have my kids I know that I was meant to be their mom. No one can be a better mom to them than I can. I love my kids so much and I could never imagine leaving them. I need to be here to protect them anyway that I can. They are the reason that I am still alive today, they are the reason that I was born. I belive I was born, to be their mommy.
Oh and my car got repoed Saturday, but it was for the best. It was only two freaking payments behind. We went yesterday and got a used truck. We got a good deal on it. We looked it up on the Kelly Blue book and we got it below MSRP. Someone up their is looking out for us! The bummer is that the baby's carseat was in the car...
that is all for now!
marcia
